Harry asks what character traits parents would most wish for their children to have. In an old survey, the top answers were honesty (overwhelmingly), then obedience and good judgment. Harry, in counterpoint, chooses kindness.

I’m surprised how often “academically successful” (to summarize several replies) came up in comments to Harry’s points. Disappointed, really.

Parents whose number one wish for their kids is that they be obedient need to go to the kid store and swap out junior for a well-trained dog. Children are not there to fulfill their parents’ needs and wishes. Unless it’s Opposite Day.

I probably shouldn’t be surprised that Harry’s academically successful readers would wish the same for their children. But it belies a belief (I suspect) that academically successful people are “more equal” than others. Raising children with that belief puts them on the path to narcissistic personality problems. (And probably also academic success.)

But, then again, I don’t have a PhD so I wouldn’t know.

My own answer? A split between kindness/compassion/empathy (pick your flavor) and deep joy. As other of Harry’s commenters noted, those of us familar with the noonday demon of depression would wish our children as far away from that as possible. A close third: moral courage.

And you?